Living the Retired Life

I am loving it! What's not to love? I get to do what I want when I want and have as much or as little to do as I choose. There are factors that contribute to this of course, I do not have aging parents... okay, let's rephrase that, yes my parents age - ba, ha! BUT, at the moment all four of our parents are in good health and living their own best retired lives. I know many of my friends have and continue to take care of their parents, and when the time comes I may want or need to do that as well, but for now my choices revolve solely around what I want to do. My children have also "flown the coop" for the moment and so again, this allows me to create my own path. And thankfully, my health and my family's health is all good. I need to start my post with this paragraph because gratitude is important. I am super grateful that I am in this position. Without our health and knowing our family is doing well, I would not be living this life at the moment. So while I can... I will!

Retired life has been great. At first it started with long sleep-ins, like really... really long and full days of pajamas and yes those things still happen, but I am trying to be productive and enjoy the opportunities that are being offered to me. I have been blessed with good friends and this makes all of the difference. If you do not have many friends for whatever reason, you have recently moved, you lived and breathed work... I honestly believe this is your first step. How are you going to meet new people? Because I retired early, many of my friends are still working and so I needed to find, not a new network, because I certainly want to keep my old friendships strong, but an extra network of important people in my life to help fill my daytimes.

One of my very best friends, Linda, was already retired and she introduced me to three very important things, the first was the RWTO, which is the Retired Women Teachers of Ontario. This led me quickly to being on the executive and allowing me to be their "media coordinator" in a way. I jumped into the program Canva and started making all of their posters for events and made them their first Facebook page. I am also on their phone tree committee and make "check in" phone calls to members to ensure they are doing well. This organization has brought me so much in terms of purpose. It gives me things to do at home, we have optional events to attend like: breakfasts, book clubs, lunches, walks, craft sessions and more. It has given me new connections and an insightful look into our senior population. Most members of our group are above 70 years old, and many in fact are above 80. I am learning and seeing a lot about aging in general. Whether it is the accommodations that we need to give them to be able to participate in something or the kind words they need to make their day. We have members who rely on walkers, canes, visual aid assistants, hearing aids and more. Some need quick access to bathrooms, can not do stairs, have low fine motor skills, can no longer drive, can not hear you on the phone, can no longer read a menu on their own... as one of the younger members I can now give back to the women teachers who came before me. I listen to their stories, help them be seated, check in on their wellness, and do what I can to be a bright light in their day. I hope this makes a difference and allows them to continue participating and enjoying being part of this important group of women.

Linda and I at the RWTO Christmas Luncheon. We spent the meal eating picnic style on the floor with a 90 year old who fell, and was fine, but couldn't get up without the paramedics coming to ensure her safety.

Linda also introduced me to Ali Edwards and her One Little Word Project. Linda and I have done this activity for two years now and it has created a very strong bond between us. More than that, those of you who know me, know that part of why I retired early is because I was fighting a depression that was brought on by how I was being made to feel at work by my administration. I took a short leave to get re-medicated, I went home to visit my parents for a week, I took 8 weeks of therapy, I started a gratitude journal AND I did this One Little Word Project with Linda and my first word was JOY! That was the year I finished working, decided I needed to stop teaching, and focus on myself. Focusing on Joy for one year, really helped turn my mindset around and has allowed me to get to this place of freedom and happiness. So thank you, doesn't really cut it when I talk about my friend Linda. She has helped guide me to this place one month at a time through this One Little Word Project. Last year my word was Strengthen. I attempted to strengthen my joints and my muscles, but also my friendships, my network, my family connections, my mindset, my marriage... and again had a solid year, except in trying to physically get stronger, I gave myself tennis elbow and pulled a muscle in my thigh that still has not recovered fully... oh, well, you can't be perfect, right! This year, I chose a phrase, "Just Do It". So far this year, I have attended an advisor only retreat staying in a cottage 3 hours from home, participated in my first curling bonspiel and started a monthly scrapbooking club from home. It motivates me to try new things and put myself out there.

And lastly, Linda had joined Weightwatchers and was very successful, losing 50 pounds. I watched her for a long time before I joined, but I did join and once again was met with a surprise. It was the friendships I have made and some very important realizations about weight, food and my journey to weight loss. This is something I have struggled with for over 30 years now and it is on my mind. every. single. day. It is exhausting! No, I am not down a lot of weight and even Linda has struggled recently, but that is the journey. Sadly it is not a straight vertical line downhill, it is hills and valleys and plateaus, at least the weight loss numbers from the scale are. The important part comes in how we are changing our view of food and how it makes us feel. I know for me, it, and by it I mean the WW plan, the food tracking, the weekly meetings, my WW leaders, the online connection board, the people and now friends in that room with me, the all encompassing it, has made me feel so much better about myself. It lifts me up and makes me feel worthy. Worthy of trying for myself and my family. Worthy of the effort and their friendships.

Some of my WW friends and I out on a walk after a meeting.

Retirement also brought me back to an old friend, Judy. Judy quickly became my mentor teacher at my school. She wasn't assigned the job, I just knew she was who I wanted to be like. She taught the same two subjects as me, except she taught Grade 8 and I taught Grade 5 & 6. Judy was my go-to expert when I had a Math question I couldn't solve or a behaviour issue that needed to be dealt with or a parent that I did not know how to communicate with. Judy had all the answers and was always calm, collected and passionate. She helped me more than she will know simply by being the role model she was. And here she is 25 years later and still role modelling and helping me figure things out. Judy runs a breakfast club for all the teachers who retired at my school, KES. She must have over 20 staff members on that list, some from before I was even there, so over 25 years ago. This started off my retirement with a group of colleagues that already had the retirement kinks worked out. Every time we meet my heart feels full. I hear the stories of their travels and adventures, get updates on their families and hear how they are living their best retired lives and I am so happy. I will take a moment to show gratitude again, because this did not happen for all my colleagues. Sadly, we lost a few very special people along the way and they did not get to enjoy their retirement the way I am. To Francine D'Souza, Jill Hogg, Bev Lytle and Widad Abdelnour - you were taken from us far too early. I think of you and your families often. I know you are watching over them all now with big smiles on your faces, but I wish you could do it here in person with us.

This happened before our last breakfast meeting that was hosted at my dear friend and former neighbour Chantal's place.

Judy also reconnected me with the world of curling. Judy has been curling for years and was trying to convince me to try it again, even offering to pick me up and drag me to the club. And so she got her way. Every Thursday from November until mid-April she picks me up and takes me to the club, willingly - lol! There have been many benefits to me joining curling, the first being I get to see Judy every week and we have 20 minutes there and 20 minutes back to catch up and bond. I didn't know I needed that, but apparently I do because in the summer I found myself missing her. The curling itself is fun, I am not spectacular, but I do okay most days. I play lead or second and love a good take out shot. Mostly I love being my goofy self and making other people smile. If you remember the cartoon Flinstones, I wear my hair like Pebbles when I curl. With a ponytail standing straight up on my head. In fact my former skip, Lise, starting calling me Bam Bam, as she couldn't remember which character it was. Now I have an enamel pin of both Pebbles and Bam Bam on my curling bag. I am guilty of not paying a tonne of attention and sometimes curlers have to remind me it is my turn to throw or I am supposed to be sweeping because I am too often chatting with someone on the other sheet of ice. Luckily most of them just think it is funny and give me a nudge. Again I have found some new friends and enjoy hearing about their hobbies and travels. Thanks Judy for giving me the push to join and be active. The exercise has been really good for me, and my cardio and mobility is improving for sure.

My first curling team. They hold a special place in my heart because I was so nervous to get back on the ice.

Is that all I am doing in my retirement... um, no! Did I forget to mention that I started an at home business, and this blog, and a YouTube channel. Yes, I have been keeping busy, and yet I still sleep in, sometimes wear jammies all day and visit other friends. It is a balancing act and for me it has been wonderful. My wish for all of you, my readers, is that your retirement will be the same. I encourage those of you who are not retired to think about what you would like yours to look like and find some positive role models who will help make the transition smooth like mine was - I am truly blessed!